People always say dreams reflect on what your innermost thoughts!
I had a dream yesterday night which reflects on what I am missing! I dreamt that Mirana, Huiling, Siti & myself was at somewhere but I could not fit into their circles! Yes, I admit after I went CTSICU since 27 January 2014, I already don't belong CCU member already. I feel left out! I have made new friends but our relationship have not grow yet & I left again for another rare opportunity. My distance between CCU & CTSICU is even further! I could not join them in their daily activities like nursing patients, attend emergency, have food feast, join in their party, share their joy! I am now a stranger to them. We do not share the common topics, only hi & bye between us. I am missing all these...working today no matter free or busy day, buying food to share before or after work, sharing a similar incident or topic, getting praise or scolding from a same supervisor or doctor etc. I cannot go back anymore. I feel lonely. Last Friday, there was a celebration at CCU, they ordered Durian cake & I told A & B that I like Durian cake. A kept a slice for me & wrote my name on a piece of paper to cover it. When A sms me, I was in a panic mode cos A wrote my name but I am not a staff there so shouldn't keep for me so I quickly finish my work & rush to CCU & swallow the cake before anyone realised that I eat the cake. Am I too sensitive?!
Now I am like alone wearing heavy amour everyday except saturday & sunday fighting the battle alone. So sad! I used to sleep like a pig til 10.30am then wake up to prepare for work & buy yummiest food to work! Now, always Kopitiam, Caffe & toast, houseman canteen, cheers & vending machine! Ok la! Sometimes TBM or Mama shop or Lele steamboat. No more as & when MT :( No company :( No friends :( What future life have I choosen? I hate this kind of feeling!!!
Whenever, I hear about my colleagues complain about Pink, I will like why why? Why? I enrol myself in this shit! Stupid gal!
I just have to fine tuned myself to get use to this new lifestyle. Accept the fact the day u went away!
Boring Sunday! I am lazy to do anything. Husband is on business trip!
Sunday, August 31, 2014
The battle begins in 1st September 2014
SCC is going to be officially stated on 1st September 2014! Oh yes! I have accepted my sealed fate. Can't be bothered to fight with the C M! Another meeting on Thursday to update us on their evil plots to tie us down with bond 1 year! My husband say there is no bond for in house course but they are super C to come up with this idea! In total I will be working there for another 3years. To be optimistic...I say it is a "metal rice bowl" for 3 years unless a dummy buy over my bond!
September & November:- Mon- Fri: 8-5.3pm
Sat-Sun, PH: OFF
October & December:- one afternoon shift per week but allowance $ give.
I think the TOP management is the ultimate people who can play with your mind, can convince or confuse u when they have already set a goal to achieve. Like me, a silly sweet potato head sure will be eaten even with the skin on. I will have to work harder to survive through this course. Do not set too high expectations or pin high hopes on me cos u r going to be disappointed.
Saturday, August 23, 2014
婚姻 to be continue...
Today I saw a video via FB. It is shocking! DOM having extramarital affair at home with a PRC. Legal wife was furious & she was pulled the PRC's hait. However, DOM begs wife to let it go but wife too affected & pulled even harder. DOM begs her daughter (who is filming the process) to ask wife/mom to let go & spare PRC. Daughter say, "mother...come, I have filmed everything down, I will post online & let everyone know. Then his daughter said this straight to his dad's face..."狗男女!!!" Finally wife let go & argue with DOM!
Sometimes when I go Chinatown, I don't like what I see! Can't blame the man? Or should blame their house's 黄脸婆?
Husband?!!
Sometimes when I go Chinatown, I don't like what I see! Can't blame the man? Or should blame their house's 黄脸婆?
Husband?!!
Friday, August 22, 2014
爱情♡婚姻♡
爱情。。。是两个人。。。一起享受的过程!
婚姻。。。也是两个人。。。一起享受的过程 不过是一辈子的事, 也不只是两个人的事!
谢谢老公爱我比我爱他多! 别要停, 你要一直爱我多一点!
Punky...Welcome to our big NICI family. .... I like U very much! Your distinctive purple coated hair is so charming.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Candy Crush👅
Life is like Candy Crush game!!!
In candy crush, the basic icons are green squares, yellow lemon, red kidney bean & blue spaceship. U might get different boosters to help u to win the game if u have the right strategies. It is like if u met a 贵人 @ the right timing...u get to win the game with high scores & move on to the next stage. At work if u have the right steps, u will be promoted fast. If u r like me, no ambitions, not brainy & just want to bluff through every month to get the fixed salary then u have 2 route- be mouldy or blacklisted. Even if I have failed for the 1st time, u can wait try again for another 4 times but if u still failed to win then u will need to wait patiently for next chance. During the game, u got to decide the moves that aids u to win the game, the right combo get u a bonus powerful candy. During work, if u have the right working partners, supervisors then u will higher chance to succeed. But evil people got evil plots to win the game with evil moves. Those silly silly 🙊 will be their pawn to sacrifice for them in order to let them win the game. In life, there are many stages that we have to go through, some easy & some difficult. Some stages, others just win it with one try, some takes a few hour & even few days to complete it. But when u are tired of clearing the stages...u will just ignore the game or sometimes delete the game either forever or download again to try again. Some might just keep trying til they clear the stage n move on.What about U?
Me? Sometimes, I want to clear the stage with determination, I will wait for the next possible chance to try again. Sometimes, I just don't care. Sometimes, I'm just bored. Sometimes, I just hate it. Sometimes, I just missed the chance of clearing the stage by one move.
Now, I was being assigned to go for a course that I didn't sign up for, why bully 🙊🙉🙈? I didn't have a definite answer if I could go back to HF after the course. I just started like in June & I began to have more interest in this subject & send me away & no promise that I will go back to the department. Then in the first place, don't like me go over. I've been leading a stressful life from 16 June til current...dreamt of missing out my work, gana scolding, when I was more adapt to their tempo, I got to move again.
Not sure if Pink is a trustworthy person anot, from what I observe & heard about her. She seems to be a 不简单的人, 假假对你好, only do things that benefit her only. Maybe she don't like me as her subordinate. I don't know. PINK called me ytd & told me that I got in the course??? What??? I replied her...i didn't apply. Then she twisted her words & say ya...is the TOP nominated me to go!!! At least ask me if I'm interested anot 1st la! Listen to ur staff view is also an important factor to make staff respect, happy with their organisation & retain staff & seek for a loyalty staff. When asked if I will go back HF? She say she don't know?!! Okay la...u also small fry even though u r promoted to Senior NC. I would not think that way if i never hear stories about u. There was a SRN working in this department b4 me, is being get rid by PINK by saying TOP say she can't take her. The staff is more hardworking than me lei! Whatever la! if they want me to die, I die for a year to clear my bond then plan for the next stage.
This year, I've like change many jobs: CCU-> CTSICU-> HF-> next possible would be Cardiac nurse speciality course for 4 months-> ???
The course: I will bluff another cert lor! Gain more knowledge. No bond. Full time. Attachment. Sub speciality. But I only learn about cardiac...no other systems but additional workload. They probably didn't see my Degree results before deciding to let me join in the course...hahaha...
Maybe the course is not as bad as I think n I might find another interest area. The office table is not meant for me.
In candy crush, the basic icons are green squares, yellow lemon, red kidney bean & blue spaceship. U might get different boosters to help u to win the game if u have the right strategies. It is like if u met a 贵人 @ the right timing...u get to win the game with high scores & move on to the next stage. At work if u have the right steps, u will be promoted fast. If u r like me, no ambitions, not brainy & just want to bluff through every month to get the fixed salary then u have 2 route- be mouldy or blacklisted. Even if I have failed for the 1st time, u can wait try again for another 4 times but if u still failed to win then u will need to wait patiently for next chance. During the game, u got to decide the moves that aids u to win the game, the right combo get u a bonus powerful candy. During work, if u have the right working partners, supervisors then u will higher chance to succeed. But evil people got evil plots to win the game with evil moves. Those silly silly 🙊 will be their pawn to sacrifice for them in order to let them win the game. In life, there are many stages that we have to go through, some easy & some difficult. Some stages, others just win it with one try, some takes a few hour & even few days to complete it. But when u are tired of clearing the stages...u will just ignore the game or sometimes delete the game either forever or download again to try again. Some might just keep trying til they clear the stage n move on.What about U?
Me? Sometimes, I want to clear the stage with determination, I will wait for the next possible chance to try again. Sometimes, I just don't care. Sometimes, I'm just bored. Sometimes, I just hate it. Sometimes, I just missed the chance of clearing the stage by one move.
Now, I was being assigned to go for a course that I didn't sign up for, why bully 🙊🙉🙈? I didn't have a definite answer if I could go back to HF after the course. I just started like in June & I began to have more interest in this subject & send me away & no promise that I will go back to the department. Then in the first place, don't like me go over. I've been leading a stressful life from 16 June til current...dreamt of missing out my work, gana scolding, when I was more adapt to their tempo, I got to move again.
Not sure if Pink is a trustworthy person anot, from what I observe & heard about her. She seems to be a 不简单的人, 假假对你好, only do things that benefit her only. Maybe she don't like me as her subordinate. I don't know. PINK called me ytd & told me that I got in the course??? What??? I replied her...i didn't apply. Then she twisted her words & say ya...is the TOP nominated me to go!!! At least ask me if I'm interested anot 1st la! Listen to ur staff view is also an important factor to make staff respect, happy with their organisation & retain staff & seek for a loyalty staff. When asked if I will go back HF? She say she don't know?!! Okay la...u also small fry even though u r promoted to Senior NC. I would not think that way if i never hear stories about u. There was a SRN working in this department b4 me, is being get rid by PINK by saying TOP say she can't take her. The staff is more hardworking than me lei! Whatever la! if they want me to die, I die for a year to clear my bond then plan for the next stage.
This year, I've like change many jobs: CCU-> CTSICU-> HF-> next possible would be Cardiac nurse speciality course for 4 months-> ???
The course: I will bluff another cert lor! Gain more knowledge. No bond. Full time. Attachment. Sub speciality. But I only learn about cardiac...no other systems but additional workload. They probably didn't see my Degree results before deciding to let me join in the course...hahaha...
Maybe the course is not as bad as I think n I might find another interest area. The office table is not meant for me.
Friday, August 1, 2014
1st August 2014
Today; 1/8/14 is a special day for Nurses, Happy Nurse's Day!
I am a nurse since 2001 til today minus 1year(2004) because I went to cheat a paper qualification. So I have been a nurse for 12years already! Time flies, I thought I could not survive this long But yes I did. Since early this Feb, I have changed my directions, moved to Surgical & now office hr. I missed my colleagues, my comfort zone, my clinical work & off on weekdays. I feel less popular, less people to gossip with, less people to cover my ass & left out. Well, it's my choice even though many high authorities has dropped me hints that it is a dead end. I just to move on as planned & granted. For the hours...that is what my colleagues comfort me. Over this new environment, I have to wear armour to protect myself from sudden bullets or arrows attack cos I am so visible now. I can't return to my old paths already. Lost touch...that is what I am afraid of cos new arrow is RRT assignment. Those higher authorities also eyes on me! After I come to this department then I realise that I need team work & I love team work! I am now all alone in the big jungle & I am lost!
This year, I have received presents from my organizations, New Boss, New supervisor and friend Anne. Waiting for my husband to get one present too.
I am a nurse since 2001 til today minus 1year(2004) because I went to cheat a paper qualification. So I have been a nurse for 12years already! Time flies, I thought I could not survive this long But yes I did. Since early this Feb, I have changed my directions, moved to Surgical & now office hr. I missed my colleagues, my comfort zone, my clinical work & off on weekdays. I feel less popular, less people to gossip with, less people to cover my ass & left out. Well, it's my choice even though many high authorities has dropped me hints that it is a dead end. I just to move on as planned & granted. For the hours...that is what my colleagues comfort me. Over this new environment, I have to wear armour to protect myself from sudden bullets or arrows attack cos I am so visible now. I can't return to my old paths already. Lost touch...that is what I am afraid of cos new arrow is RRT assignment. Those higher authorities also eyes on me! After I come to this department then I realise that I need team work & I love team work! I am now all alone in the big jungle & I am lost!
This year, I have received presents from my organizations, New Boss, New supervisor and friend Anne. Waiting for my husband to get one present too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)